Apparently fewer and fewer sperm are showing up for work these days.
Men around the world are suffering from low sperm counts.
Can we blame the sperm? Lying around in that crowded and sweaty hammock, day after day, waiting for action.
It's like being a fireman. Polishing your big red truck for the hundredth time. Lazily throwing balls for the Dalmatian. Where's that alarm? Waiting. Please, give me a reason to slide down that pole. Yawning and waiting…
Just like the sperm.
My theory: Sperm street gangs.
Sperm are exiting through the nose, every time a man blows it. They are gathering in numbers too big to calculate, in the cracks and crevices of neighbourhood alleyways.
Taking insemination into their own, um, tails?
Be very careful, ladies. Think twice about your next alley visit. You could end up wrestling gangs of 6 or 7 billion angry sperm. Swimming for victims, similar to the many-tailed Sentinels from The Matrix. Sure, the mace might work on a few thousand of them. When it's all over, you wake up and you're knocked up.
Soon, a planet of only sperm.
Kinda makes sense, actually.
