There's no desperation quite like the desperation of a man wearing a toupee.
Essentially he's saying, "Ha, the entire human race ages, but me."
Wait a minute, it's worse than that. "My entire body is aging. I have double D breasts, jowls that look like two hammocks on my cheeks, an entire set of luggage under my eyes, chicken legs, crocodile skin. But my hair is as thick and black as the oil wells of Saudi Arabia. Must be a miracle."
What kind of mental Cirque de Soleil gymnastics takes place in this man's mind that he is convinced no one notices.
Come on. You might as well have a penis sewn onto your forehead.
"Hey Bob, do you notice this penis on my forehead?"
"Hmmm a penis, you say? Not at all."
"When I die at 89, I'd like a black coffin, to match my thick black hair."
Just grow old, will ya?
HELLOOOO NEWMAN: Laughter is your sixth sense
