Cosmologists tell us that the universe is made mostly of dust. Is it a surprise some of it makes its way onto the furniture? Can you explain that to my wife?
These days attention deficit disorder should be considered a strength.
We always talk about rain delays, but no one ever considers the annoyance of sun delays. It took two weeks to film Gene Kelly singing in the rain, due to a bunch of sunny days.
I enjoy tennis because it has the word "love" in it, although I would prefer the word "sex".
I never play chess because after 3 moves there are now 121 million possible combinations of moves. I can never decide which one to choose.
I always make sure my hair is nice when I'm driving, just in case I get snapped by photo radar. I wonder if you're not suppose to smile, like in your passport photo.
HELLOOOO NEWMAN: Laughter is your sixth sense
