Tumour

I think the reason I don't eat grapefruit anymore is that they're always compared to the size of a tumour.

Oh, that tumour is the size of a grapefruit. Same with pears. Never eggs for some reason.

Can we pick something other than food to measure tumour size? I don't want to eat a tumour. It causes tumours. How about just using a tape measure.

Golf ball is a better choice. Golf is an annoying and stupid game and shouldn't exist, just like tumours are annoying and stupid.

These days I only eat the fruits that can't be compared to tumours – banana, pineapple (you'd be dead if the tumour were that big), screw pine (because no one's heard of it).