Tuesday 11 April 2017

Oscar the Grouch



This is United Airlines CEO Oscar Munoz, aka the Seat Nazi, aka Say Hello To My Little Seat Policemen, aka Your Airline Ticket is Shit to Me and finally, Oscar the Grouch.

Oscar looks grouchy because he was just forcibly removed from his La-Z-Boy seat by his wife and children, even though he booked his seat two months ago to relax and watch the chainsaw shower scene from Scarface. "The guy in the shower deserved it", says Oscar.

Unfortunately, the La-Z-Boy was overbooked, with Oscar's wife offering it to her lover for the night, CEO of Air Canada, who is a much nicer guy and has great health care.

It's not like Oscar's family didn't try to negotiate. They offered him an intensive week-long seminar in Chechnya viewing all the Saw movies in the most comfortable chair that country has to offer.

He refused.

Oscar is left to wonder if he will be forcibly removed from his big boy CEO chair.