Idearrhea

I went into a Bed Bath & Beyond and asked to see the Beyond part. They couldn't tell me where it was. No one had a clue. All they could tell me is several other people went looking for it and haven't been seen since.


How come it's so easy to lawyer-up in the U.S. but really hard to doctor-up? No one even says "doctor-up". Lawyers take care of the "Liberty" part, so shouldn't doctors take care of the "Life" part? Guns, drugs, and hookers take care of the "Pursuit of Happiness" part.


What are "soft skills"? If I leave them out on the counter overnight will they get stale and become "hard skills"?


I saw a woman in Chapters reading a book called Five Steps to Making Your Dreams Come True. I made my own steps.
1. Hard work
2. Luck
3. Hard work
4. Luck
5. Hard work and luck
Mine's better because it fits in your back pocket.


Ever notice that the definition of traffic is all other cars but yours? If you think there's too much traffic, get off the road.


I hate those signs in stores that read, Yes, We Are Open. I prefer, No, We Are Not Closed.