Friday 15 April 2016

Political Thought Crime


With an envy-soaked heart, I read the bio of a 20-something girl I met recently.

She has a degree in Political Thought.

My God, the younger generation is catching up.

I felt so…educatedless.

I carry around my Honours BA in psychology, which was purchased in 1985. That makes it almost as useful as my current Bachelor in BBQ, with a minor in marinades.

What distinguishes political thought from…political science? Or political discourse? Or, depending on the politician, political intercourse?

Wait, that's easy. Three of these involve the mouth, the other doesn't.

How do you test for political thought?

Professor: What's this?

Student: My exam.

Professor: You wrote in down. On paper.

Student: Um, yes.

Professor: I can't accept this.

Student: Why not?

Professor: This is a course in political thought. We don't write things down here.

Student: But how do you know what my thoughts are?

Professor: Oh, you want to express your thoughts, do you? I suppose you want this to lead to a conversation? You've developed an opinion, have you?

Student: Well, there's so much more to learn, but…

Professor: Hold that thought. My dear sweet girl, university is no place for a conversation. That leads to disagreement, and next thing you know we are apes, swinging from Facebook post to Facebook post, eating people's reputations like so many bananas.

You don't want a PhD in Regret, do you?

Student: (silence)

Professor: I thought not.