I think the Bible would be much more effective as a series of tweets than as a thick, inconsistent and painfully boring book.
"In the beginning, God created the…blah blah blah"
Why not, "Lights, camera, action"
Boom. End of Genesis.
Exodus: "Cool pyramids but slavery sucks. #freedom"
Easy to read. To the point. No confusion.
Dude-eronomy: "#mosesrocks #travel"
The Gospel According to Luke: "Use the force"
Book of Revelation: "We be gettin' judgy on yer ass."
The End. Of everything.
HELLOOOO NEWMAN: Laughter is your sixth sense
