They tell me to put my best foot forward, but I can't tell which foot that is.
I've examined them closely. They look the same. I think they have the same IQ, in terms of walking ability. I can balance easily on one or the other, except after 4 or 5 Jägermeister. I'm usually trying to balance on my head by that time.
By the way, I sure as hell need a pedicure.
I tried putting both feet forward at the same time. Two feet are better than one, right?
Fell on my ass. Can I just put my best chair forward, with me sitting in it?
HELLOOOO NEWMAN: Laughter is your sixth sense
