One or Two Virgins

Does Heaven ever run out of virgins?

God (Allah) must have trouble meeting the demand. Think of how many terrorists have been killed since 9/11, and each one gets 72 virgins all to himself. Do the math. The numbers are staggering. Where do they all come from? Just how old are they? (disgusted face)

A woman can only be a virgin once, as I understand it. Unless Putin hacks their vagina and erases their virginity. Then posts it to Facebook. Status: previously pristine.

I was kind of hoping I could visit a virgin or two when I get to Heaven. I'll be single, since "til death do us part" means once I die I'm no longer married. I won't sacrifice myself for Allah, mostly because there's no way I could handle 72 virgins. I'll be asleep half way through the second one.

So one or two is good. Can I order now?