Thursday 12 July 2018

Pee and Poo

I've noticed that Newman has a different relationship with pee and poo than I do. His criteria in dealing with it is…shall we say…less stringent? No. Not as well thought out.

Case in point. When Newman pees, he lifts his leg. This tells me that he thinks peeing on himself is gross. Otherwise he would just pee and save energy with the lift. It's smart. Makes sense. I completely agree with him about the pee.

Then, after keeping himself pee-free, he turns around and eats a piece of his own crap. What the hell is that? How does that fit with the "pee is gross" behaviour? It's completely contradictory.

I put pee and poo on pretty much the same level. I don't want either on me, even if it's in a sex game.

The sad fact is I'll never really get Newman. But I don't get my wife either, so…