Have you ever been fired?
What an unpleasant feeling. I had one job where I hated my boss so much, I wanted to grind him into a fine powder and sprinkle him in the ocean. Even though he wanted a traditional burial.
Still, being fired from that job felt terrible – even though my boss wanted me to climb a 35 foot, unsecured ladder to paint a tiny window no one could see. Risk a permanent head injury? Gosh, can I?
There is one job I can think of where getting fired is the best outcome you can hope for.
Kamikaze pilot.
Failing at this job looks good on a resume because at least you're around to have a resume.
"Hey, what are you doing back here?"
"What? Oh sorry. Got lost. Couldn't find any ships to slam into. Looked everywhere."
"Well, you realize you're fired, right?"
"Oh ya, no problem."
"And you'll never work in this industry again."
"I know. What a shame. But I think I'll be okay. Some re-training. Pound the pavement. I'm feeling pretty positive."
"Pack your stuff and get out of here."
"You took all my stuff just before telling me not to return."
"I really thought this was your calling."
"Me too. Then I thought maybe something else is calling me. Like an office job here on the ground. Or pizza delivery. Something that requires me to be alive."
"You're making a big mistake."
"I guess I'll live to regret it."
