Friday 6 January 2017

Mammogram




Who came up with the word mammogram? I'm guessing a man.

Mammogram is too similar to words like cookiegram and balloonagram for my comfort. I might venture a guess that the man who coined this term wasn't getting the serious nature of the topic. Typical man thing to do.

It sounds like something delivered by a stripper to an office party.

"Hey Jim, you got a mammogram out front. You'll never get through all that. Gonna share?"

I've come up with some far superior names. They combine the playful, to reduce anxiety around the procedure, and the serious, so we're all on the same page about the vital nature of this test.

Mamm Exam: I love the lyrical rhyme, paired with the clinical nature of the description. Almost like pairing a nice red wine with a well-marbled side of beef.

Breast Test: A little less clinical, but still love the rhyme.

Tit Test: Before you get mad at me for the crudeness of "tit", remember that "tit" is the name of a bird. Context is everything. Okay, this might be the wrong context, but the alliteration is funky.

Let's wait to see which one of these terms gets widely-adopted by doctors.