Wednesday 16 November 2016

I Hope


I was watching a documentary on t.v. called How To Prepare For Prison when it occurred to me, I wish Morgan Freeman would narrate my life.

You know, like he does in The Shawshank Redemption.

It would attach such gravitas to those dull moments and chores in my monotonous existence. While I'm cutting my toe nails or removing dead skin from my heels I could put on an opera record and Morgan's voice would kick in, soaring in its humanity and pathos as the clippings fall into the toilet bowl.

Here's a typical scene in my life, as narrated by Morgan: "Paul sat in his chair, and I tell you, the birds of freedom soared that day like they've never soared before. Towards the sun. The light of knowledge and freedom. He was free. Free as a bird. No prison for Paul."

Something like that.

Maybe it's worth going to prison just so he could give voice to my life. I can always escape, like Andy does in the movie. But not through the sewage pipe. Nope. I'd have to find another way. I have an allergy to human feces, especially if there's gluten in it.

Otherwise, that would be neat.