Wednesday 22 August 2018

Car Names

I can't believe some of the pussy car names they come up with these days.

The Nissan Qashqai? What the fuck? The name's from a mountainous region in Iran where 4 people and 10,000 goats live. Awesome. If you can't afford it, buy the Nissan Death Valley. Or the Dead Sea, uses water bags instead of air bags.

The Maxima? Was MaxiPad taken?

I really want to buy a Nissan Cube. Comes with a free Rubik's Cube. Drives like one, too.

The Kia Cadenza? Is that named after a musical cadenza, which means an improvised musical passage. Did they improvise the making of this car?

Chevrolet has two called the Bold and the Volt. The Dolt is still in the works.

 The Subaru Impreza was suppose to be the Impregnate, but it didn't rate well in focus groups.

Here's two I would build.

The Ram Syphilis. Goes from zero to your doctor's office in one alcohol-fueled night.

The Nissan Husbandfinder. Drives up the elevator shaft and right into the hotel room where your hubby is banging the secretary.