I realize I’m dating myself here, but does anyone remember the potato gun, also called the spud gun? (see above)
One would puncture a potato with the tip of the gun and put the resulting tiny potato piece in the “chamber” and fire it with compressed air.
Well, that was originally my invention and it was stolen from me.
Okay, not quite that invention precisely.
My idea was the mashed potato gun. It had operational difficulties. The mashed potato kept getting stuck in the chamber, or the tip, or it would get all over my clothes. All the butter on the potatoes meant the gun kept slipping out of my hands. Obviously I couldn’t enjoy my mashed potatoes without a nice juicy steak but that became so expensive.
I then tried the scalloped potato gun. The scalloped potatoes, being large and round, would not fit in the gun, plus I loved eating them so I ran out of ammo pretty quickly.
Au Gratin Potatoes? Same thing.
For the southern states, I wanted to introduce the hash brown gun. Way too big for the gun, and greasy. Maybe you could fire it from a surface-to-air hash brown launcher, but my mom wouldn’t let me build one of those.
Time to move on to another type of weapon.
I developed the french fry bow and arrow. I liked my french fries ultra crispy and covered in ketchup, so when I fired a test weapon at a friend, it broke skin and the ketchup made it look like a mortal wound. Back to the drawing board.
I’m still working on this so no more stealing.
