Thursday 4 July 2013

Visiting Hannah, Montana

I wish Hannah Montana would stop singing. This would be my objective if I won a huge lottery. I would double her yearly salary and pay her to be a mime artist. She could move to Vegas and do very well. Or maybe a full time spokesperson for Laryngitis Anonymous.

I'll certainly never visit Hannah, Montana again. Everyone there just yells into microphones. And when people grow up there, they have to dress like sluts so the world knows they aren't daddy's little girl anymore. It's such a clever debutante kind of thing. And the mayor of Hannah, Montana - Billy Ray Cyrus - doesn't seem to mind how his constituents behave. As long as they keep paying those huge taxes.

Toto, I hope we're not in Hannah, Montana anymore.

I realize the possibility that only readers with kids might know who Hannah Montana is. For those who have never been to Hannah, Montana, can I have your brain?