Helloooo Newman: Peas and Ques

Helloooo Newman: Peas and Ques: For a man who I figure has eaten a lot of bbq in his life, including a few actual bbqs (tank included) , I'm shocked Mr. Ford shut down ...

Peas and Ques

For a man who I figure has eaten a lot of bbq in his life, including a few actual bbqs (tank included), I'm shocked Mr. Ford shut down a bbq joint. Maybe because he hasn't fully digested it all yet.

Mr. Tory? Well, he looks a little too slight for bbq. I wonder how he'll react if a bamboo shoot and edamame shop opens up?

I Smell Pork

Pulling out 100 cops for a pulled pork shop. How wonderfully…Canadian.

Helloooo Newman: I Smell Pork

Helloooo Newman: I Smell Pork: Pulling out 100 cops for a pulled pork shop. It's so wonderfully…Canadian.

Helloooo Newman: No, Not Makeup

Helloooo Newman: No, Not Makeup: I was walking down Yonge street and said to a lady, "Hey, enjoying the mascara?" Well, "mascara" is what she heard. She ...

No, Not Makeup

I was walking down Yonge street and said to a lady, "Hey, enjoying the mascara?"

Well, "mascara" is what she heard. She looked offended. 

What I said was "mask era".

Enjoying the mask era?

Ease up, lady. And get your hearing checked.

Helloooo Newman: Miss Universe

Helloooo Newman: Miss Universe: Since cosmologists have found that the universe is rapidly expanding, Miss Universe will now have to be pregnant to qualify.

Miss Universe

Since cosmologists have found that the universe is rapidly expanding, Miss Universe will now have to be pregnant to qualify.

Lawyer Joke?

Did you hear the one about the lawyer that was caught masterbating on a zoom call?

No really, he was. 

A lawyer who regularly appeared on CNN.

No joke here. I don't think.

Helloooo Newman: Lawyer Joke?

Helloooo Newman: Lawyer Joke?: Did you hear about the lawyer that was caught masterbating on a zoom call? No really, he was.  A lawyer who regularly appeared on CNN. No jo...

Helloooo Newman: Universe

Helloooo Newman: Universe:  Come on universe…you owe us.

Universe

 Come on universe…you owe us.

Helloooo Newman: This blog has no title…

Helloooo Newman: This blog has no title…: and it's not about anything. It's definitely not about the American election. Oh, except did you know that pumpernickel loosely tran...

This blog has no title…

and it's not about anything.

It's definitely not about the American election.

Oh, except did you know that pumpernickel loosely translates from the German to "goblin fart"?

Enjoy that ham sandwich.

Helloooo Newman: And the winner is…

Helloooo Newman: And the winner is…:  I think wherever the vote count is when I have my warm milk and go to bed  is who should be president.

And the winner is…

 I think wherever the vote count is when I have my warm milk and go to bed 

is who should be president.

Helloooo Newman: Huge Day

Helloooo Newman: Huge Day: Well, it's finally arrived. The big day. Tomorrow. I've been giving it a lot of thought. I'm a little uncertain, but I've de...

Huge Day

Well, it's finally arrived. The big day. Tomorrow. I've been giving it a lot of thought.

I'm a little uncertain, but I've decided I will put my socks on first and then my pants. 

Historic.